Spent most of the day glued to my TV and devices while I followed an eventful MLB trade deadline. This isn’t quite the vacation I wanted, but it’s the vacation I have, and I’m spending it how I want: lazily and at home. I should get my car tomorrow, but I’ll believe it once I’m driving it again.

I remember that back in May, I stayed up past midnight so I can see the aurora borealis for the first time in my life. I grabbed my bag with my camera in it, put on my sandals, and hit the road. I had no idea where I was going, but once I was on the road, I remember feeling both excited and free. I could go wherever I want, I remember thinking, and in a way, I did. I went down a road I’d never gone down before, I found a dark and secluded area, I parked my car, and I took some photos of the beautiful night sky.

I miss my car and the freedom and possibilities it gave me. I hope I get it back tomorrow.

Last night, a severe storm with winds that raged up to 109mph hit my corner of Montana, knocking out power and damaging whatever got in its way. I woke up in the middle of the night with no power and the strong winds rattling my doors and windows. If this heatwave wasn’t enough, now we have to worry about hurricane level winds? Jeesh.

I woke up at 1:30am and I wasn’t able to get back to sleep before I had to get going with my day. Fortunately, power returned to my small town, so I was able to stop by my favorite coffee shop before I headed to work. This shop sells some funny stickers, and here are a few I liked that I sent to my friend on Snapchat. Both hit home today.

Admired the reddish skies this morning while I waited for my friend to pick me up before work. According to the weather forecast, today should be the last day temperature gauges hit anything above 90° for the next week, and I welcome any relief from the heat, even if the highs will still be in the 80s. Not having my car has been inconvenient, but relief is only a few days away, and I can’t wait. In the meantime, I’ve been learning more about alternators and enjoying some good baseball games.

I first met Rickisha Bear ten years ago. She was a 5th grader at my school district, and I remember how outgoing and funny she was even at that young age. She was not afraid to joke around with someone a few decades older than her, and I loved joking with her back. She transferred to another school during her 6th grade year, and sadly, I didn’t really think of her much after that. Kids come and go at the school, and I tend to forget about people when they’re out of sight.

Rickisha went missing five months ago, and I first heard about it on Facebook when a former teacher of hers posted about it. I shared her story to my Facebook feed and hoped for the best. The history of missing indigenous women is not a good one, and I didn’t want to lose hope that Kisha was still alive somewhere out there… but again, out of sight, out of mind (I hate that I’m admitting this, but goddammit it’s the truth and the truth fucking sucks sometimes).

I went to the laundromat to do laundry this morning, and right there on the bulletin board I saw her face again. “Bring Kisha Home!” I felt sad and guilty and simply heartbroken that she is still missing. She recently turned 20 years old, and… fuck. I don’t know. If anyone reading this has seen or heard from her, please send a message to this email or call or text (406) 604-2423. Bring Kisha home. Please.

I think all this smoke has driven everyone crazy. A couple of employees (and friends of mine) resigned from the school today, a few days after a somewhat contentious board meeting, or so I’ve been told since I didn’t go. Small towns spread rumors faster than conspiracy theories at a Trump rally, and I heard one thing one moment and the complete opposite the next that at some point, I simply stopped caring. Maybe that makes me a bad person or a bad friend, and honestly, maybe I am both, and I think that’s okay because this smoke has driven me crazy, too.

I went back to the reservoir and saw a few kids fishing. I drove past their ATV and found a nice spot by the rocks. I breathed in the fresh smoky air and shot some photos with my X-T4, and then I went home.

More of Montana is burning and the skies are thick with smoke. A fire broke out about 10 miles down the road from me and western Montana is now under stage I and stage II fire restrictions. This relentless heatwave sees no sign of easing off any time soon, and this smoke will only make things hotter.

I could taste the air on my way to work this morning, so I stopped off to get a cup of coffee at my favorite coffee shop. I enjoyed it while I grabbed my camera and snapped a few photos of the hazy skies.

Sloppy joes for dinner tonight.

There aren’t enough wildland firefighters and the Miller Peak Fire has grown to over 1,900 acres, something I knew would happen a few days ago. That temptation to un-retire from firefighting is growing stronger and stronger… but wildland firefighting is its own kind of commitment that I don’t think I can afford to make anymore. I do miss it, though.

I subscribed to The Athletic yesterday, and I’ve been very impressed and engrossed with the new season of Hard Knocks: Offseason with the New York Giants. Seeing the behind the scenes at roster construction is interesting as hell. I stopped watching the NFL years ago (around the time the Chargers defected from San Diego to Los Angeles), but I’m considering jumping back into it this year.

Also, I’ve never coached anything in my life, but I am thinking about popping that cherry sometime during this upcoming school year. I love sports, and I love kids, so it only makes sense, right?

The Miller Peak Fire is the first fire I’ve seen this fire season, and it’s the first time in many years where I actually missed firefighting. I’ve now been out of firefighting longer than I was in it, and it almost feels like another lifetime ago. As of this writing, the Miller Peak Fire is approximately 500 acres, but considering the terrain and the high heat expected this week, it will more than likely expand and grow bigger than that. Now that I’ve been out of firefighting for a while, I’m hoping for a shorter and milder fire season this summer, which is a stark contrast from when I was firefighter, when each fire excited me to no end. Now I have a road trip in a few weeks to look forward to and become excited about.